During my C-section I felt like I was invisible. It was so important to me to get as many pictures as I could just as I did with my other c sections and I wasn’t told when the procedure started or when they were about to pull my baby out. I felt as if since I was an outsider I was treated as such. As if they were just trying to get the job done so they could be done for the evening. After my baby was born they took him over to clean him up and let my support partner get a few pictures.. wrapped him in plastic then let me see him for one moment in passing as they were taking him to the nicu. I didn’t even get to kiss his face or touch his hand. A baby who was a part of me for 31 weeks was taken just like that and I was supposed to just accept it. I then was told since I was on iv magnesium I couldn’t go see or even touch my baby for 24 hours and was given a link to go to to watch him on my phone screen. A hospital that is so supportive of antepartum care you'd think would do more to help with difficult transitions like this and help make it possible or push for just 2 minutes of skin to skin after birth (given the baby wasn’t in serious distress). Hell I would have settled for one minute of skin to skin. I feel that that first 24 hours was so crucial to be with my baby and could have helped benefit him so much, but no one seemed to care about how I felt or what I was experiencing mentally, not one of my nurses helped in any way get me to my baby any sooner. I kept getting told he is in good hands but that meant nothing to me in that moment. I just wanted to hold my baby for the first time.
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